You Think You See, But You Have No Idea

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Jasper, Alabama, United States

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Hearing in the Dark

When I was pregnant with Cam, we read all the books, went to all the classes, quizzed all our friends and family trying to gain information that would help us with labor and delivery. When I saw the pamphlet for Lamaze classes that were being offered at the hospital that I would be having my baby at, I snatched it up. After all, thats what you do when your having a baby, you go to Lamaze. When I got home, I made the called and found out when the classes started. We were told to bring a pillow. I was so excited. Lar was too. The afternoon came, we got dressed, drove down the the hospital. It was so thrilling to know we were going to get to share time with other parents and learn techniques to help with labor and delivery. When we got there, we went to the wrong floor. Searched. Panic. No one knew what we were talking about. This was a new program that was being offered. So we read our pamphlet again, and realized our mistake. We were 10 minutes late. Uggg, I hate to be late. When we got there, no big deal, we weren't the only ones who had gotten lost. Thank goodness.

We began the class by going around the room telling our names, and if it was our first child.
How fun this was.
Then the instructor told us to get in a comfy position with our partners behind us.
We were going to start by learning some relaxation techniques.

Then to my horror, without warning, she turned OFF the lights!!!

Larry could feel me tense up. He rubbed my arm. Letting me know he was there with me and it was okay.

Then she began to teach the class.
I heard nothing she was saying, because not only was I in the dark, she was whispering.
Then to my horror again, I heard the parents apparently answering questions.
Please, please don't let her ask me anything.

We laid there in the dark for what seemed like eternity.

I know they were talking and discussing things, because every now and then someone would be just loud enough I could hear parts of what they were saying.

To say the least, it was a nightmare.

Then the lights came back on and it was time for a break. Snacks and drinks.

Larry took one look at me and said, "you want to go?" I just nodded my head yes.

We slipped out the door without ever saying a word to anyone.
The minute we were out in the hallway, I burst into tears.
I was devastated. My first real important task as a mother and I failed.

The next day I went to see my chiropractor. He asked me how Lamaze went. I told him the story. Then he gave me the best advice anyone gave me my entire pregnancy (as far as labor and delivery) "You don't need Lamaze. Your body knows what to do. Trust it."

So I did. I had the most wonderful and perfect delivery. It went a beautifully as I had hoped it would.

The thing about this story that I find interesting is the fact that now, I would jump right in there and be like "Wooooohhhaaa,,,what are we doing here? I'm hearing impaired, I'm going to get nothing out of a class in the dark." Then see if we could reschedule for a Lamaze that would be more appropriate for my situation.

It really doesn't matter though, because in the end, it worked out.

I'm just so thankful that I can now speak up when its "too dark" for me and I can't hear. I have to be Cams advocate, and show him the way to be his own advocate....
I have to show him the way out of the darkness.


Karen Putz said...

I can understand that process. What changed in your life that made you more willing to speak up?

AmyKay said...

My son changed EVERYTHING.
Infact I'll write a blog on that. Thanks for the idea.