You Think You See, But You Have No Idea

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Jasper, Alabama, United States

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I can love myself and my ears

I am so amazed by how much self acceptance along with the awareness of my own needs that I have acquired since I started this blog. Writing this blog has had the most profound impact on who I am as a person and how I view myself and how I view being HoH. It has truly opened my eyes to a world within myself that I didn't even know existed. I had no idea how much my life was effected by wearing hearing aids and being hearing impaired. Almost every area of my life is effected by being HoH, and yet I had never given it much consideration, nor did I know how much help I needed.
It seems so easy now. This is who I was meant to be. Becoming aware of my limitations has, as odd as it may sound, been the most freeing and liberating experience.
I'll give you an example. The other day at my little boys baseball game, I said, without even thinking about it, to one of the other mothers, that I needed to coach Cam to play as a hearing impaired child. (to use his eyes as his ears) I was shocked that I said it so casual. Then later I said I need to tell the coach that when Cam is on second base and looking at his coach for the signal to run, he needs to stay focused on Cam, so Cam can stay focused on him. Then just as natural as could be, one of the moms commented to me about something that had been said and I asked her what had been said because I couldn't hear. Wow. In the past I would have just done the yeah, I don't know what your talking about but I'll pretend I do, nod.
Its really okay to be Hard of Hearing. Its okay to need help. Its okay to ask. Its okay to be hearing impaired and not pretend you hear everything. Because I don't hear everything, and sometimes I do need help.